It wasn’t until I got to the guard shack….

It wasn’t until I got to the guard shack that I realized I had an identity issue.

My parking pass said “Mike the Photographer”. It was early Spring of 2015 and this was my first professional photo shoot. A mid-sized, ok, pretty damn big 5/3 with an office and enclosed pool on a lake.

“Mike the Photographer”, who’s that? I’m an audio engineer! Not anymore I guess, I’m here to photograph a house now. Inside, my guts felt completely out of place. Instead of excitement, I was on the verge of vomiting.

Weird, because I can’t tell you how many times I’d rolled up on a video shoot or a recording gig with a car full of gear and all the confidence in the world. But this was different.

There are no rules. Nothing (especially back in 2015) online to teach you the intricacies of photographing a listing. I mean, you just don’t show up, turn on your camera and snap. Oh, it’s much more complex.

In preparation for this glorious day, I had practiced in my house. A lot. Photographed in and out of it repeatedly. My Dad’s house too. And even a friend’s house. Hundreds of practice frames to get me going. Whatever, “Mike the Photographer”, just you wait.

The minute I rolled up on this baby, I knew I was in trouble.

See where I came from, we had scout days, shot lists, scripts, producers, stylists, advertising agents. Something or someone to give some kind of direction. That’s how it works. But not here.

After just a moment inside it became apparent to me that most agents and sellers know nothing about media production. But then again, it’s not their fault, it’s not what they do and they shouldn’t be expected to. Now it’s all on me.

So I problem solve. How do you present a home that you’ve never seen before, know nothing about and don’t even know where anything is? But it has to be beautiful, immediately catch the eye, and sell the house. Right.

Features? I mean really, all I’m seeing is a shit-ton of things that I have to photograph: rooms, kitchen, pool, bathrooms, appliances, laundry, garage…). Oh, and at that time, MLS was only allowing 25 images per listing.

Actually, I kind of like 25. 35 at the most is great. Always leave them wanting more. Just because we can produce 90+ images of a listing doesn’t mean that we SHOULD do it. Besides, how many people will really look at all of that? None. Like they want to see 15 shots of the roof?

So I’m in these nice peoples’ house, absolutely dumbfounded. Have no idea where to start and where to go. First day as a professional photographer is starting out as ‘first day in hell’. Really. What do I do?

I went outside to get exteriors. Figured that as I shot, it would come to me. And very, very, very slowly it did. Kind of. At least enough to get me through it. Because of where I came from, I had something to lean on, even if it was just a little bit.

See, in corporate video, infomercials, commercials and similar, we’d bring grip gear, lights and tons of ‘problem solvers’. Usually that stuff came in a separate large truck along with a couple of crew specialists as well.

Not the case here. I’m stuck with available light only (wasn’t doing strobe at this point). And let me tell you that I never knew how much our eyes and brains compensated for everything. And I mean everything. We are truly exceptional organic machines.

Cameras - even modern digitals with all their advanced chips and software don’t come close.

So, how do you get such chaos to look like “Architectural Digest”? That’s what I was faced with. And damn was it daunting. I mean, people are depending on me - both the agent and the sellers - to make something gorgeous, something that sells the house. And even with a beautiful home under mostly decent conditions, it’s a menacing beast.

I limped, stumbled, cursed, fell, got up, fell again, cursed louder, made more mistakes, cursed, thought about running away, wondered where all my production experience had gone, cause it doesn’t seem to be helping me at all. This was my first gig and I felt like I was failing miserably. But at least the house was super clean.

Fast forward some 3.5 hours! Yes, 3.5 fucking hours! I’m done. I showed the agent and the sellers what I had shot. Actually, not as horrible as I first thought, I can do something with this - in editing.

The agent thanked me and wrote me a check on site. Of course, her advice was that I had to be faster, as I took way too long on location. No shit, I agree wholeheartedly, but truly, thank you!

Fortunately for me, another agent just happened to show up. Hired me right there for one of her upcoming listings. Looks like my fledgling photographic career was on a roll! But that house would prove a very different and even harder learning experience….